After her fifth Chatime in as little as 10 days last month, Ms Xi swore to herself she would not buy Gong Chafor a very long time. Yet somehow the syrupy treat has found itself into her hands once again.
“Am I more productive with LAC vs DAL playing in the background?
Instagrammers who are hoping to book a stay at the resort have not officially been denied, but their talent agencies have been told ‘try posting an old photo first’.
It appears Tobias Chan forgot to empty the watery residue.
“Hey Dennis, I noticed you added in bit off a twist at the end there. Why?”
“It’s like a total party in my mouth guys. Get. On. This.”
Surprise: there’s definitely a 90s hip hop album thrown in despite only knowing the one song.
“I’ve never even liked that dish. What the fuck?”
And before you say ‘Jen, you’ve only ever had surface level friendships who probably don’t remember you as anyone other than the Asian chick who they don’t mind fetishising, then here’s what I have to say:
“Melissa’s pretty good aye”