SUPPLY AND DEMAND BABY JP Morgan Private Equities graduate Jack Long has always been more interested in his developing skills to run his own business, rather than serving a master forever. However, his latest business venture has gotten Jack sacked, before passing probation. Mr. Long was first reported by office cleaners to have stolen 50...
Despite finishing work 3 hours earlier and living only 15 minutes from work and uni, Andrew has elected to keep his new MJ Bale suit on for his Accounting B class. The UTS underground finished his underpaid Cadetship at 5:30pm, went to the gym, had a nice dinner then changed back in to his suit...
Parasite director Bong Joon-Ho has announced his retirement, shocking the film world and Korean fans around the globe. When The Native correspondent and Korean culture specialist Jenny Zhang questioned Bong why he would leave his craft at the top, he had the following response. “It’s true what they say, the better the Korean director, the...
Local alpha dog and Senior Account Manager Brian Singh is having a yarn with his colleagues. “Yeah I had Jake on speaker phone while he complained about his $15,000 overspend on his account.” Explains Brian. “It was a good time to create my NRL fantasy team for the year, I can’t decide between Latrell or...
“And now I’m all out of money.”
While Sunnybank faithful Wei Wei Xhu (48) sent twenty tubs of Enfamil NeuroPro Ready to Feed Baby Formula back home last month, it appears this month will be her biggest yet. That’s because Wei Wei will be expanding her export efforts to a currently higher-in-demand product: Industry grade face masks. With the coronavirus reaching a...
After recently travelling to China to explore her family roots, Jodie Wong (20) isn’t feeling great to be back at work. “I think I’ve got the flu” Jodie sniffles at her cubicle desk in the bullpen with 5 other goons. “Weren’t you in Wuhan?” her colleague Will Pan asks nervously. While Jodie did just come...
REPORTING FROM SAN FRANCISCO, CA After a decade of collecting personal data from its 200 million+ user base, it appears LinkedIns marketing team is nailing their true target market: Young Asian Professionals. The current signup page, seamlessly features three graduates of East Asian descent, over the age of 21, who probably work at the big...
What the fuck? Mid-level investment banker Vincent Duong (26) is today facing an identity crisis. Despite earning a $150,000 per year salary on paper, when divided by the average of 200 hours he works per week, Vincent’s hourly wage comes to a paltry $15. “What the fuck?” said Duong as he scanned his colour-coded pivot...
Hahaha..haha..ha? Local ENFP, Sebastian Tobias Lew (27), has always thought of himself as a people person. Lew’s combination of self belief, empathy and ability to build rapport with strangers is what landed himself a job as an associate at one of Sydney’s top boutique management consulting firms. It’s also what’s just lost him a big...
