Funny Cunt Asks For Raise
Funny Cunt Asks For Raise

Funny Cunt Asks For Raise

You kill me Steven

Although he’d intended to come out of the meeting with an extra 5k in salary in the new financial year, Steven Peng (26) has instead returned to his desk with the following label: office clown.

The sudden rebrand as a funny cunt comes after the 5th year accountant thought he’d try his luck asking for a pay raise in the current economic climate. “Would it hurt to ask?” He asked himself today. “I’ve been working hard this year”

The worst that can happen is that they say no, he then reassured himself.

Unfortunately for Steven the worst did happen.  

“Let me get this straight Steven.” confirmed his boss Josh. “You’re after 10% increase”

“Yes, Josh”

“And despite the fact that revenues fallen 30% year on year, you’re not joking”

“No jokes here, I just want to be paid my worth”

At this point Josh could no longer contain his laughter. After a brief outburst he decided to move the young Asian along.

“You kill me Steven. Now get back back to work you absolute clown.”

Steven fails to consider that it’s a bit of recession right now and people are kind of taking pay cuts at the moment.

He also forgot to consider where he came from: beneath the bamboo ceiling, Josh later told the CEO of the company, fuming.

“You don’t just bite the hand that feeds you. You make us rich and we decide when to give you honey. I’ll discipline him Gareth”

When asked if he’ll ask again for a pay rise, this is what Steven left with us.

“I don’t think I will. It probably won’t be funny next time”

More on this story to come.

Exclusive interviews with modern day Asians. Follow: @youngasianprofessionals

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.