In both a kind yet confusing twist of fate, Takeshi Aoki has been let off the hook.
The 16 year old skate-rat from Torrance, Los Angeles was considered “real fucked” after his highschool sweetheart Meg Firestone (16) revealed a positive pregnancy test in early hours of last Saturday.
“I was ready to get that samurai sword from the garage and disown myself…you know, save my pops the trouble”
Luckily for Mr Aoki’s genetically-inclined kamikaze tendencies and his fathers antique war piece, cooler heads would prevail.
“I told Keshes Dad over text ” says a nonchalant Meg.
“My sister had an abortion at 16 and my dad has 2 kids from two seperate relationships so it’s like chill dude”
The Yap Native got in contact with Takeshi’s father, Goro (45) to find out what the restaurant owner knew about his sons sexual activity.
Goro states while he had a feeling Takeshi was going out a lot on school nights, he had no idea his son was such a god-damn pussy slayer.
“He’s got posters of Glenn from the Walking Dead all over his room. I should’ve known.”
(Glenn, played by Steven Yuen wins the heart of Maggie XXX, a white female.This plot development has been cheered by many young asian men).
With the question of abortion or keeping the baby looming somewhere in the next few weeks, Goro swaps his metaphorical dad-hat for one of nationalism.
“I mean he’s 16 so he’s screwed from a responsibilities standpoint if he keeps it, but if it means advancing our race, then that’s just way the sashimi slices”
Goro also doesn’t mind that his son’s bagging of a caucasian girl brings him closer to the white-people-trying-asian-food market. He’s been looking for a way to access an average higher price on his restaurants menu for while to boost it’s flagging income.
“I have many hats. But my favourite is my cash-money hat.”